A Billionaire Walks Into A Bar With A Pickup Line

Ever hit record, pour your heart out, and realize nothing saved? That false start set the tone for a candid ride: a restorative week at Orange Beach, the joy of doing nothing but watching waves, and a shockingly great condo shower that doubled as a mini spa. From there, we pivot into a promise I’m making to myself—one full year to get strong and healthy before turning 60. No more snack runs that “don’t count.” No more treat math. Just clear choices, better routines, and the energy that comes from keeping a promise to your future self.

We also talk about connection in the real world. I finally met Laura IRL, and it felt like sitting with an old friend—proof that the best conversations don’t need filters or algorithms. That contrast made the political circus feel even louder. I share why I’m weary of self-congratulatory sound bites and cheap shots, and why disagreement doesn’t have to become cruelty. Holding leaders to a standard isn’t disloyalty; it’s the point.

Then we wade into dating and parenting debates that set the internet on fire. A billionaire’s “May I meet you” pickup line gets graded against honest, human openers that actually work. Spoiler: clear, kind, and specific beats canned charm every time. And yes, we tackle the diaper-consent controversy. Respecting kids matters; so do practical boundaries and timely care. Narration can teach without theater. We wrap it all with a lighter lift—crowning the greatest rock band—and I cast my vote for AC/DC with zero hesitation.

If you’re craving a nudge to reset your habits, laugh at the week’s wild takes, and rethink how agency shows up in everyday life—from dates to diapers—this one’s for you. Hit follow, share with a friend who needs a fresh start, and drop your pick for the greatest rock band of all time. Your turn.

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Liberty Line each week on Sunday, look for topics on my X file @americanistblog and submit your 1-3 audio opinions to anamericanistblog@gmail.com and you'll be featured on the podcast. 

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Chapters

• 0:00 Lost Recording And Vacation Recap
• 1:18 Condo Joys And Beach Routine
• 3:03 Diet Blowout And Health Reset
• 5:32 Meeting An Online Friend IRL
• 6:46 Politics Fatigue And Trump Critique
• 8:30 Billionaire Pickup Lines Mocked
• 11:51 Best And Worst Openers Shared
• 13:34 Baby Diaper Consent Debate
• 15:16 Question Of The Day: Best Rock Band

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:15

Well, hello, good morning, happy Tuesday, y'all. I'm back from vacation. Yesterday I pulled up extra early at work to start my podcast because I knew I had a lot to talk about. And I pushed record on my voice app and I talked and I talked and I caught you up on everything. Talked for a good 20 minutes and I went to go turn off the voice memo app and guess what? It did not record. What the hell? Okay, I don't know what was happening. I guess uh the universe just didn't want me to put out an episode yesterday. Not that I'm that important because I'm not, obviously. Little black, little blade of grass. That's all I am. That's all we all are, right? Unless you're Donald Trump or his administration, then you're big oaks. Okay, I don't even know where that came from. Alright, vacation. We went to Orange Beach for a whole week from Saturday to Saturday. Oh my gosh, it was wonderful. Just sat two of the days were cold, so we didn't go down to the beach that day. Now the gent and I, when we go to the beach, we like to actually go to the beach and sit there and do nothing. We'll talk to each other, we'll read a book. I've never nodded off on the beach that I know. I've not fallen asleep, not taking a nap or anything. But I just sit there and watch the waves roll in onto the shore of the Gulf of America. It was fantastic. The weather was perfect, except for those two days. Uh, not hot, not cold, but it was great. Nice getaway. Our condo, oh my gosh, was wonderful. Y'all, this bathroom in the main in the master bedroom, oh my gosh. It could have been a room by itself. You could have fit 15 people in that shower. It was one of those walk-ins, and it had several nozzles, you know, whatever you call it, the shower heads, whatever. Oh, you oh, it was just, and it had a little bench you could sit on if you wanted to. You could that could have been a room in there. Anyway, I'm going on and on. It was a nice condo, very nice. V R B O. It was Phoenix Phoenix 9, I think is the name of the building. There's a lot of Phoenixes down there. The condo condominiums the name of them. There's a lot of Phoenixes. We stayed in Phoenix 9 this time. Fantastic. Recommend it. We're gonna make it an annual thing. Because it's a lot cheaper than going on a vacation somewhere else, getting a flight, and blah blah blah. Alright, you don't really care about that. Oh, so this also during this whole week, I just blew out my diet big time. Not that I was doing real good before, because I'd gotten off my diet, gotten off keto, was eating terrible, and and so right before we went on vacation, I thought, you know what, I'm gonna be 59 next month, December, which is coming up, which means I'll be 60 next year. So I thought, you know what? I want to take this year and get into the best possible shape I can get in. I got a whole year to do it. I would like to lose 50 pounds, but I'm gonna really look at being fit and healthy instead. And if the weight drops off, then great. But I want to be in the best possible shape I can be in by the time I turn 60 next December in 2026. So I've created a little routine for myself and what I'm gonna buckle down and where I work, you can go next door to this building, and it has like a little chopette in there, and it has all kinds of junk food, potato chips, cookies, uh, you know, those microwaveable sandwiches, it has candy bars, galore, drinks, soft drinks, Gatorade, Starbucks. They have, I mean, they have all kinds of stuff over there. And every day I found myself going over there after lunch. I'll just get a pack of cookies. One little pack of cookies is not gonna hurt. Well, it does, it adds up. And when we were on vacation, I decided I'm gonna blow it out. Just blow it out this week. I'm on vacation, screw up. So we had ice cream every night, we had Starbucks every morning. Oh, y'all. Um I was bad. But now that I'm back, we're buckling down, eating healthy, no Starbucks anymore. I'm done. No, not even as a treat. No, done, done, done. No Starbucks. Because I need to get it fit and healthy and lose weight. I can't believe I'm gonna be 60 next year. That is insane. That it's gonna hit me hard. But at least I'm alive, upright, and vertical. Now a lot can happen in a year. But today I'm grateful for being alive. Okay. Uh, there was some other I guess was there something else? Oh, I got to meet Laura Reps in real life. She is just like she is on Twitter too, y'all. Lovely person, fantastic. She is a great person. And it's so funny because we got there and we just sat down and started talking like we've known each other forever. It was so comfortable. For me, it was. And she got to meet the gent, and the gent got to meet her, and she bought us breakfast, and it was a place called Bagel Heads. We need one of those in Huntsville. No, we don't, because we're gonna be healthy. No more bagels. Alright. Let's move on to. I guess that's all I've got for you. It seemed like there was a lot more I had going on, but seemed like there was. But we're gonna go over here to my profile. Uh was oh, I think I talked about Marjorie Taylor Green yesterday too, and all that hubbub. And I'm sorry, but Donald Trump is losing his shine for me. He gets on TV and all he loves to do is just talk, talk, talk, talk. He was on TV last night. Like, why is Fox News covering this? He really does love himself, which is fine. He's doing a good job. He signed executive orders, but that's all he's done. Now I know he can't do much of anything else because Congress needs to do shit, and they're they're not doing anything. But this whole thing where he is attacking Marjorie Taylor Green and Thomas Massey, that true social he sent on sent out on True Social about Thomas Massey being getting married really soon after his wife died, was uncalled for. It was gross and I d that really has tarnished my view of Donald J. Trump. I put up with a lot of stuff from him before, but that was awful. That was terrible. I don't care how much you dislike somebody because they're not agreeing with you. That's just uncalled for. Alright. We need to move on to the topics. I only have two because I knew I would get on here and talk a lot about other stuff. Alright, let's see. Podcast topic. Let's see, which one do I want to do first? Okay, we're gonna do this one first. Billionaire CEO's archaic dating advice. Ruthlessly mocked. So the post found out which pickup lines are better or worse. Oh boy. Did you guys have a pickup line when you were out there and about dating, or did you just immediately get with your significant other and just stayed with them? I don't know if you guys played the market or not. We'll see. Uh, thanks but no thanks. Bill Ackman, the CEO of Pershing Square Holdings, had a weekend epiphany posted on X that digital dating has killed romance. He's not totally wrong, but we've all known this already. Where has he been? Well, he's a billionaire and he doesn't need to worry about it. And that the reason why single men are struggling to meet potential suitors out in the wild is because they're not using the right pickup line on a woman. His flirty conversation starter of choice is May I meet you Okay. Are you not are you already talking to him face to face? Are you not already face to face with them and meeting them? That makes no sense to me. May I meet you? It's a head scratcher for sure, but the billionaire swears he almost never got a no by using it. Well, hun, it's probably because they already know you're a billionaire. So of course they are not going to say no. What a dumbass. Thousands of people quickly chimed in on the post, trolling Ackman's outdated opener. I don't see anything wrong with it, but whatever. Uh but his advice raised an even bigger question. What are the best and worst pickup lines people have ever heard? Because let's face it, singles have gotten both wittier and weirder in today's dating world. There are a lot of witty people out there, let me tell you. If I was out on the market right now, it would be the guy with the most witty pickup line. Okay, he needs to make me laugh, that's for sure. Because let's face it, I already okay, I already read that. The post did some digging to find out which lines were wooed or bewildered the masses. In our newsrooms, for instance, a reporter once asked by a guy, okay, was once asked by a guy up for some nonsense, which much to her friend's surprise, she thought was clever and cheeky, and I agree it is. I don't it is. An editor also copped to hearing a pickup line from a friend that he seems to have stored in his memory bank as he wasted no time answering this question when he asked, Oh no, I'm not repeating that. It says nice shoes wanna F you mm-hmm. That's terrible. That is terrible. Don't say that to a woman. In the real world, meaning on social media, it was a mixed bag. Every time I've said to a woman, Hey X, I like you and I'm attracted to you, I'd like to get to know you better. I've gotten a date. Another ex uh on ex, Melissa Chin, fittingly enough, the vice president at Strategy Risks, a geopolitical risk analysis company, shared a sweet line that would have worked on her if she were still single. Two days ago I was leaving a supermarket in North London when a young man, I think he was twenty one, at most twenty five, came up to me and said, Can I take you out on a date? I smiled, showed him my ring on my finger, and I said, I am engaged, but if I were single, I would have said yes. Well, I guess that's pretty straightforward. I like the straightforwardness too. That's nice. Emma Davis told the post that her now boyfriend sweetly referenced the brutal heat wave NYC experienced the past summer. He messaged me her on Tinder over with an opener. Hot enough out there for ya and it swept the twenty six year old right off her feet. What that did? It was probably one of the corniest ones I've heard, but he got me and four months later here we are. And while plenty of people thought Ackman's pickup line was downright creepy, compared to other conversation starters people have been approached with his shockingly wasn't the worst of them. Okay, we're gonna read one more paragraph and then we'll stop. Adia Sesams 38 messaged the post that a man if a few words once approached her as she was heading to the bathroom. He might have gotten cold feet in the moment because the only thing that came out of his mouth once they were face to face was good night. Okay, whatever. Okay, you can go finish reading that. That was kind of dumb. I thought it was gonna be better than that, but it's not. Alright, this next podcast topic for the New York Post. Now they've already talked about it on Fox News this morning on Fox and Friends. I swear they read my X file because everything I put out on there, they read. I'm just kidding, they you know they don't. Alright, you ready for this? Parents? This is so asinine. Parents should ask babies for consent before changing their diapers. This is according to experts. What in the world are we doing here? It's a move that might stink to some parents, but there's a new age way to change a newborn's undies. Drenched diapers are no longer messes that need to be ripped off a baby's bottom post haste, according to new advice by early childhood development researchers in Australia. Well, there you go, it's Australia. That explains everything. Australia has lost its way. Instead, the experts encourage moms and dads to request an infant's consent. You read that correctly before changing their diaper. At the start of a nappy change, ensure your child knows what is happening. Researchers from Deacon University wrote in November 2025 guide. Get down to their level and say you need a nappy change diaper change, and then pause so they can take this in. But their off-beat directives for cleaning a cutie's batootie, a task that parents often rush to just get it done, the researcher said, doesn't end here. Oh dear. Then you can say, Do you want to walk or crawl with me to the changing table? Or would you like me to carry you? Oh my god, this is frickin' out of control. What in the world? The experts further noted, further noted, this can be a time to help children learn about consent and how to their bodies work. They're infants. They don't know. They're not aware, they're not they're infants. Do you remember being an infant? The experts further noted, okay, I already read that the author of the report did not immediately respond to the post request for comment. I guess not. Probably too embarrassed. However, having heart to heart with rug rats every time they go number one or two could fall under their ever controversial category of gentle parenting. Yeah, I'd say so. It's an ultra-permissive, anti-authoritarian approach to child rearing that prioritizes empathy, respect, connection, and communication over rules and punishments. You people are out of your mind. It's a diaper change. The diaper needs to be changed. Change the damn diaper. You don't need to ask permission. You people are out of control. It's Australia, though, so take that for what it's worth. Alright, we need to get to the question of the day. I had two questions of the day yesterday that I thought were going to be spectacular. And of course, now I can't think of any of them that I had. Okay, what's the best rock band of all time? I, my favorite, I don't know about it, my favorite is AC DC. Now, whether they're the best of all time, I don't know. But my favorite is ACDC. I love ACDC. I think they're the best rock band. Well, my f my I have a lot of favorite songs from them. I think my favorite one though is it's a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll. I love that would be my walkout song. And I'm sorry, I probably have asked this question before, but it there it is. Best rock band. Okay, I gotta go. Thanks for listening.